Since I've Been Gone

It has been a long time since I last wrote. I have been so very busy with this, that and the other thing that blogging has been pushed to the side. It is never totally out of my mind so for that reason, here are all the things I have been meaning to write about but have just never gotten to just yet.

1. How to find out who your true friends are: By a fifth grade girl
The other day in Awana club one of our girls came over to my group. When she sat down I noticed that something was wrong with her. She looked different than normal. She asked, "Do you notice something different about me?" I said, "Yes, but I cannot put my finger on what it is." She said, "Well, I was having a hard time figuring out who my true friends are" (a very troubling thing for any girl..tis true). "So," she said, "I decided I would shave off all my eyebrows and whoever made fun of me was not my true friend." My hat goes off to her. Very few of us are brave enough to take such drastic measures to discover our true friends. I asked her, "Did it work." "Pretty much" was her reply. I love fifth graders.

2. How to scare your enemy: By a 12th grade boy
On Thursday the boys football team had a big playoff game. That morning, one of the players (who is also in my homeroom class) left his backpack behind in my room. When my first period came in (crashing down the hall much like charging elephants do), one of them knocked the backpack to the floor. Suddenly, out of the corner of my eye, I saw a thick cloud of smoke rising from the backpack. My heart began to pound because my worst classroom nightmare (aside from the one where I get to school and I have no clothes) is the one where the student "accidentally" leaves there backpack in my room and then it explodes. So, here was my nightmare playing out in real life. In a desperate desire to save my students and maybe myself (if I was lucky) I ran over to the backpack and looked at it closer. In fact, it was not a bomb. It was a HUGE canister of blue Gatorade powder that had burst all over the floor, all over the students football pants, all over EVERYTHING. I tried to cheer him up by saying, "Hey, just think, when a defender on the other team smashes into you they will freak out because there will be an explosion of Gatorade." He said, "Nope, I will be distracted like crazy because I will be sweating blue Gatorade." All I could do was laugh.

3. How to make your teacher laugh: By a misbehaving 10th grader
I was in the middle of a class and one of my students just cut right into my conversation and began his own. I stopped, told him to put his name on the board, and proceeded to teach again. When he did it again, I told him that he was showing a "flagrant disregard for rules and regulations" which in hindsight probably made no sense to him but it did to me. He says, "You mean like when you do not put on deodorant?" I almost split my face trying not to laugh.

4. How to remember you love teaching: It only takes one student
Yesterday reminded me again why I love to teach. We started a mock trial in Government class (hence the reason for a lack of blog posts...I have been preparing for that in addition to keeping up with the rest of my work). Anyhow, I gave out the "roles"of the mock trial and the kids literally needed no redirection from me. They got into their huddles and the lawyers and witnesses started learning their roles. It was so inspiring to see my kids WANT to do something, not just because it was fun but because they had a genuine interest in how the process works. I just wish everyday was like this.

5. How to giggle like a school girl again: It only takes one student
Today we heard from my "witnesses" in the trial. I told the kids they had to stick to the facts of the trial but they could add their own personality to it. Long story short, the plaintiff in my case is a boy who got hit on his bicycle by a passing motorist. Anyhow, the defendant is stating that he never saw the boy on the bike and that the boy was breaking the law in that he did not have reflective clothing or a bike light on his bike. Well, we get the plaintiff on the witness stand and the prosecution asks him to state his name and all that stuff. Then the lawyer says, "Where were you going that night and why were you riding your bike so fast?" Here is what the plaintiff replied with. "Well, I was just finishing my charity work (the salvation army) and I was driving really quickly because I had to rush home to my two crippled parents so that way I could feed them because if I take too long to feed them they could slip into a coma. Also it was starting to get dark....not dark enough where I thought I needed my bike light but JUST dark enough so I worried that I might be mugged in the park." I had to pretend I was looking up a law on my computer so the entire "courtroom' did not see me laughing (since I have the role of judge). The kids are having so much fun and they are LEARNING so much. It just makes me feel like I am doing something right for once. I love when that light comes on and the kids come into school and tell me that they spent EXTRA time preparing for class and that they actually did WORK. I love it. Reminds me all over again why I originally caught the "teaching bug."