Today at my work, this was left behind for me and my coworkers. Now, I am a Yankee, so you people who are Southern to the core may have seen this item a million times, but this was a new one on me. It is called a "kitty litter cake." I opened the door to the teacher's lounge and was transfixed. I really could not believe what I was seeing. I was conflicted. Do I laugh hysterically and appreciate this great practical joke, but of course not eat any because I am kind of scared? OR do I run from the room in terror wondering what poop-related treat awaits me inside the fridge or in the coffee pot? I have recorded for you my first initial thoughts.
1. NO WAY
2. Is this how the maker of the cake feels about my job performance?
3. Does this taste good and who was the person who was brave enough to try the first bite?
4. Do I use the pooper scooper to obtain my slice of cake? (which I never did bring myself to try...sorry to whoever made it).
5. What would my cat have said if he could have witnessed this?
6. I wonder if I could fool Ryan into thinking I had lost my mind later today if I took a picture of me eating out of the litter box in the right setting?
7. MUST...TAKE...PICTURE
8. NO STINKING WAY
9. *insert excessive giggling and pointing*
10. Next Halloween do we get toilet bowl ice cream surprise or sewer pipe jelly roll or plunger upside down cake?
Now, to sum up....I really do hate Halloween. Do not get me wrong...I do love dressing up and doing the whole costume thing. But the trick or treating makes me crazy. Think about it. If I was a martian and I visited earth for the first time today, I would wonder what in the world humans are thinking. First of all, we give away stuff for free (when else in the calendar year will we give away sickeningly sweet objects away for free to total strangers). Second, it takes place in the dead of night, no one can see and when you open your door there is a kid with a battle axe or a Tommy gun or a 20 foot long knife, he is covered in blood and he has his face inches from your door. CREEPY anyone? Then, if that is not enough...if you want to keep the trick or treaters away from your home, you must either find a reason to flee your home from the hours of 5 pm till about 10 pm or you must sit in your house in the pitch dark. Now, I ask you...what is safe about those solutions? NOTHING. A serial killer, an axe murder or an evil sadistic clown could appear at your door and we open it right up and throw candy in their gross nasty old pillow case that smell like old socks. AHHHHH....I will be happy to see November first dawn tomorrow morning. Besides, I love November. Thanksgiving (my second favorite holiday) and my birthday both happen this month. Welcome November...October, you will NOT be missed.
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