Things....

Five things a teacher HATES to hear....
1. "There was a test today?"
2. "That homework was due today"
3. "I lost that handout again"
4. "I lost my pencils and we don't have money for any more" (A kid really told me that once)
5. " I was out for three weeks, do you have my makeup work?"

Five things a teacher loves to hear....
1. "That was interesting" (don't get this one often)
2. "Thank you"
3. "Can I help you with something"
4. "I never heard that before, thanks for telling me"
5. "Class went by so fast today...wish we had more time"

Five things that will make a teacher feel like she is lower than a worm
1. Angry stakeholders (parents or grandparents that feel you are not doing a good job)
2. More than half the class failing an assignment
3. Projects done with half-hearted enthusiasm by students who you know could excel
4. Lesson plans that mysteriously "vanish" or get "deleted"
5. Failing a student who you KNOW could pass

Feelings Show....

The other day I went to the doctor and long story short they had to put me on some new medicine. Good news is, no more headaches...bad news is the medicine makes me feel a little pukey (not a real word, I know) and it makes me get irritable quickly (which is not the typical me, usually it takes a couple tries to light my fuse). Well, I felt like I had been masking my feelings pretty well about how I was feeling. But then something really convicting happened. One of my sweetest, quietest, shy students came to me at the end of class. He stopped by my desk and in my frenzy of "between classes maddness" I quickly asked him if he needed to ask me something or if he needed me to explain something. He didn't say anything for a second, which actually caused me to look up at him. He stood there, as if he was almost afraid to ask me the question that was on his mind. "What's up (insert student name here)?" I asked him quickly. "Mrs. Withee, I was just worried. You seem stressed, are you doing ok?" I was floored. Was I really that transparent that even my students can see the gaping holes in my armor? It melted me. I told him thank you and that he was very sweet for caring. I tried to explain that with the change in my meds, and the over-abundance of things I have to do of this time of year, I was just tired and jumpy at the same time. However, it made me think: What message am I sending my students by my mood? Am I telling them that my God is supplying all my needs and is gracious and full of mercy or am I showing them that I am "strong" enough to carry my own burdens with out God's help? It is a thought worth pondering when you start your day.

Climb, climb up laundry mountain...here no breezes blow

Well, school is in session. Ryan and I actually said that to each other the other day. Now, to some, that may seem kind of obvious. But, in our house, school season has not officially done until you wake up for work one day and the husband has no clean socks and all your "school" outfits are in the laundry. I have been a wife for working on three years now and I think I may have finally found the solution to laundry mountain. My first year of marriage laundry went like this: I was under the delusion that the house must be kept in prime conditions at all times, so the laundry must also be kept in prime condition at all times. Ryan would come home from work and his work clothes would go in a laundry basket, my fancy school clothes had a basket and towels had a basket. Everything had a place. Ryan very seldom woke up for work and asked "do I have any shirts clean?" Year two: I was sick a lot of year two, but somehow, most of the time, the laundry was done properly. That was the year that we got the dog and so it was the year of the eaten socks. There were socks that just vanished and there was never an explanation until you went out into the yard and then you figured it out. THEN, year three rolled around. Now, I decided that there are things that matter more in life...like spending time with your spouse or doing something you actually enjoy. So, laundry looks like this. I grab whatever dirty items I see, I throw them into the wash and then the dryer. Then I hang anything that should not wrinkle. That is step one. Step two happens on another day. That is the folding step. So, if you visit me in-between step 1 and 2, you may see a pile of clothes somewhere, but have no fear...they are clean. Finally, step 3 is the putting away process and I must say that this is the most "neglected" step because I hate it. However you slice it...I think laundry has been the bane of the female existence since Adam and Eve left the Garden, and we have yet to really find a way to make it better. Yeah, we do not have to go to the river and fight off the gators to get the clothes clean, but it is still a very time consuming process. If I were wealthy and had someone to do my bidding...I think I would still want to clean my house (there is a certain catharsis in it for me) but I would gladly show my hired help where the laundry room is and surrender my crown. Alas...this post must now end because I must begin my weekly climb up laundry mountain. See you on the other side.

Diets rock....not...

Well, at our house we are currently on weight watchers. Ryan started a couple of times but we both realized that if we are not this diet together then it will not work. So, we are coming to the end of week 1. I have eaten lettuce till I am green in the face. All chips and snacks have gone out the window. We have eaten carrots and V8 juice. The workout schedule for Ryan begins quite early in the morning. Finally, weigh in day is around the corner. The thing that shocked me the most about this whole diet is portions. It used to be if we had popcorn, we EACH had a giant bowl with cheese and butter. Now, we each get a small pyrex bowl of popcorn and it is low fat, no butter, a little salt. When we eat dinner, it is not a heaping plate of food, it is a small helping. However, we weighed in tonight and I am pleased to see that I am about 3 pounds lighter than my last doctors visit told me I was. I am happy. Switching from BigMacs to big, green salads really can be a good thing.

P.S. I am ACTIVELY seeking yummy, low-fat, weight watchers recipes. So, if you know any, please pass it on.

What is the world coming to?

Just the other evening, Ryan and I were watching some sort of show on television and a commercial came on. I actually found myself so offended by this commercial that I considered writing the company and complaining. It was a commercial for some sort of manly, musky, "make-you-irresistible-to-the-ladies" soap. Well, the soap commercial would not have been offensive except the commercial continually referenced male body parts in a blatant (not even in an innuendo-ish) manner. I was shocked. Ryan and I then began discussing how far television was gone since we were kids. I remember when the first Victoria Secret commercial came out and every one was appalled. Now those models selling underwear dance around with nothing on (which I never understood...I mean, if you are selling a product, aren't we supposed to see it so we want to buy it???) If you look at television shows as well, there has to be people half dressed or kissing or worse. When the television show "Leave it to Beaver" came out way back when (before I was born...but my family are big retro-tv people so I grew up on that show), Beaver and Wally had the first toilet ever shown on tv and that was a HUGE deal. In I Love Lucy, she was one of the first women to discuss being pregnant on a television show. Now, what do we see....people in all states of undress, people in the shower, people on the toilet....it just never ends. All I have to say is...my kids will be watching a whole lot of Leave it to Beaver and Lucy, because the options that will be available for them will be worthless.

Never Forget

I am sure there are some out there who will say, "Oh no, not another 9/11 post." But, I think that just stands in testimony of the fact that Americans as a whole have forgotten that horrible day and how it changed our lives forever. The fact that we have forgotten was perfectly realized to me when I asked my students last year to write a short essay on what they remember about that day and how it changed life for Americans. I got the essays home that night to read and grade them and I got responses like "I do not remember anything except my kindergarten teacher cried all day" or "I lost a tooth that day." Then, it struck me: the generation that actually lived through that day and had vivid memories of it had failed to pass on that history to the ones who are coming up behind us. As a teacher, I found myself teaching a lesson about that day to my students. Some of them had never heard all the details about that day. It just floored me. Now, I understood why my dad could talk about the moon landing with such emotion and I always looked at it with a kind of "ho-hum, I read this in my history book" attitude. My kids and those who will come after them will always look at it with that kind of attitude. Hopefully those of us who remember the terror, the pain, the suffering, the emotion of that day will never forget and will never allow those who will come later to forget.

What's the Deal?

I love going shopping. It is very seldom that I actually buy anything of substance. When my best friends still lived in the same town as me, we would call it "trinket shopping" because we usually came out with one or two little trinkets that cost hardly anything at all. So, the other day I had a Saturday all to myself. Ryan was at work and everyone I called to do something with was busy. In a way it was nice because I went to whatever store I wanted and spent as long as I wanted wherever I was. Well, I happened to pass by a book store that was having a tent sale and as much as I fought the urge, I had to go in. (It was ironic that it happened this week because I JUST did a purge of my bookshelves...which is hard for me because book are like friends and I hang on to them as long as I can.) Into the tent I went and was instantly regretting going in because I had my hands full of books in two seconds flat. Then, before I went to the counter to buy them, I evaluated my purchases and changed my mind on all but two. So, I bought them and moved on with my life. Before I left, I found a little section of the tent full of cookbooks. Those near and dear to me know that I only have two true addictions in my life. One of them is coffee in any form that it comes in: blended, steamed, black, cream and sugar, mocha, latte, iv injections...whatever. And the other addiction is cookbooks. I cannot stop myself, when I see one I have to have it. Well, the other day at the tent sale I had a break through. The cookbooks I picked up had one major flaw: no one would eat any of those things. I looked at the ingredient lists and I was not even sure what half of those things were. One recipe was something like barbecued asparagus flavored picked herring over a bed of almond pureed mush with rosemary garnish. Who eats that? Can anyone honestly walk into Publix and buy any of those fruity ingredients. I remember a couple weeks ago I had a hard time finding raspberry red wine vinegar. I dare anyone to find some "essence of coconut" (which I saw in another recipe). Who would really look at those freaky foods and say, "Oh my I want to make that tomorrow for dinner when the company comes over." Plus, for a woman whose husband will not even eat tomatoes, I do not think any of those things would fly. So, I put the cookbooks down and walked away a winner in my mind. I walked a little taller as I left that book sale with just two little books. One addiction down....one more to go.

So, I think I might be a nerd....

The other day I came to a startling conclusion: I am a nerd. Do not ask me how I came to this conclusion on my own so suddenly and with no help(because I am sure those near and dear to me have known it for some time now). I realized it on the way home from work the other day. I have gotten into this new radio show that has these little money saving tips on it all the time. When I hear the words, "deal of the week" I find myself turning up the radio and trying to write down the store or the deal while I drive. I have even, once or twice, picked up the phone to call my mom just to tell her that I got two bags of frozen veggies for just .50 cents each. Then, while I was in the grocery store last night (which I might add is one of my favorite pastimes...if I find myself at home alone and bored I will run to the grocery store). Last night I was in the cake mix/condiments/salad dressing isle and it occurred to me that I am a nerd, but I am also an old lady. There I stood in the isle with my Mary Poppins purse open wide in the cart where the kids are supposed to sit and buckle in. I was digging into the depths of my purse to find a coupon for salad dressing because they were already buy one get one free and this sent me into a tailspin of joy because I would be saving so much money. It then occurred to me that the little man stocking the shelves was observing me with something akin to either confusion or irritation (I am inclined to think it may have been the later). Then, once I made it to the cash register with my coupons in hand, clutching them as though they were solid gold, the cashier also gave me a slight eye roll as I handed him my wad of coupons. BUT, when I saw my receipt and literally giggled inside with glee, I think that confirmed my nerd-ness. BUT, in a day when money is harder and harder to save and there is no such thing as a free lunch, I would rather be a nerdy old lady with a Mary Poppins purse who saves a buck or two, than to be a woman who never checks the newspaper for a coupon. So, if sometime you see a girl dancing through the parking lot with her "bargains"....do not be alarmed...it is the 24 year old nerdy old woman named Amy.

You know you are a teacher when...

You know you are a teacher when...
1. You get home and you still have that item (cheese-its, silly band, you name it) you confiscated from your student in your pocket
2. You know which kid the item came from and plan to find them and give it back
3. All your pants have either red pen marks on them or expo marker hand prints
4. Study guides and late homework assignments show up in your dreams (and they have faces and drive cars) (I will never be able to live down the night when I shook Ryan awake from his sleep and warned him to "WATCH OUT FOR THE STUDY GUIDE CARS"....Hey, at least I warned him.)
5. You have called your husband the name of your most ill-behaved student in a fit of rage
6. You have the "eyes of death" look down pat and sometimes use it outside the classroom
7. You buy shoes based on the fact that you will not want to cut your feet off at the end of 7th period because of the pain
8. You live life in terms of semesters and not years
9. You cringe when you hear the words, "Wait, we had homework last night?"
10. The Dollar Tree and the dollar bins at Target are places you are routinely found lurking in case they have something you just cannot live without in your classroom
11. You are a better handwriting detective than any FBI agent because you have many times deducted who that nameless paper belongs to.
12. You can remember the name of all 90 of your students and what period they are in and what their book number is but you cannot remember your own grocery list at the store.
13. You cry big tears of joy and your heart actually swells when your student stops and says, "Hey, we learned this last year in your class."

Number thirteen happened today and I made me think of this whole list of things that are true of people in this profession. And, no matter how many pairs of pants I ruin because I washed my expo marker in my pants pocket again, no matter how many times that kid forgets to put his name on his paper, as long as they have learned something at the end of the day...well, I guess that makes that whole list worth while...study guides included.

Excuse Me

I know the world is a busy place and people have places to go and people to see, but does that mean that common courtesy has to go by the way side? This morning I woke up and decided to dress up a little so I put on my new favorite outfit (picked out with help from my mom because I need her fashion help...I am not the best at that myself). So, I went to work wearing my "Barney" sweater (it has purple, yellow, and brown polka dots of various sizes on it...so I call it the Barney sweater). On my way, I decided to stop at one of my new favorite coffee places and pick up a little pastry and some coffee. I placed my order and walked over to the register. Once there, a lady in a flustered, frenzied fashion placed her order behind me and walked up to the register, sauntered past me where I was PATIENTLY waiting for the cashier, use her hind end to kind of wedge herself between me and the register, put her card on the cash register, reached behind the counter to get a coffee cup, and then left the line to get her coffee. I wanted to yell out, "EXCUSE me lady, you cannot tell me that you did not see me standing here in this Barney sweater...it had polka dots all over it and it has BRIGHT colors. You cannot miss me." THEN, when the cashier tried to take my money first (after all, I was there first) the lady kind of looked at me, pulled up her nose in a wrinkle of disapproval, and then waited for her turn. So, I took my cup and filled it up. I went to reach for a lid and noticed the "hurry lady" left her cup just sitting there on the counter. So, she walked over to me, looked at me, and muttered, "Is that YOUR cup." It was all I could do to not say, "No, my cup is in my hand because I had the patience to wait and keep myself collected and calm." But, instead, I pasted on a smile and said, "Nope, that one is yours...I take my coffee black." The old adage rings true: "A lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on mine." Just because she did not properly plan her morning does not mean I need to freak out and be flustered and rushed. I can only imagine what she would have done had I decided to make EXACT change or something with my order. My mom taught me many things...and I am so thankful that being patient and waiting your turn was one of them.